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  1. Latest Entry

    I'm not a very open person in real life. By not open, I mean that I don't really show much emotion or really talk about my personal life. Very few are allowed to ménage a trois with myself and the skeletons in my closet. It's most likely because I see most emotions as a sign of weakness, as well as the act of pitying another. It's my character flaw I guess, though many would debate it's arrogance or conceitedness. Maybe they're right, though in complete and utter honesty, I view both as a badge of honor. Welcome to the life of an ESTJ.

    Anyways, I came to get a story off my chest. It's been eating at me for a while, but I'm too embarrassed, angry, and sad to talk to anyone about it just yet. So, I had been seeing someone for about 3 months (though if you include the time we spent fooling around and generally just hanging out it has been 7) and we recently just ended things. I wouldn't say we dated in secret, but I definitely wasn't exposing much about our intertwined times. I like relationships to be personal, not up for display to be poked and prodded by the masses. However, it was known that we were seeing each other by many. To say I had fallen for him is an understatement. I really haven't felt so comfortable, nor have I grown in a relationship quite like this. I know this seems silly because we were only technically dating for 3 months, but we were fairly good friends before. He said he lost romantic feelings for me, and that he had been smitten with someone else. I being the stonewall I am in these situations decided to ask who, and his answer was Theo... my female best friend (he's bi with a preference towards men). After some coaxing, I found out they had been talking and seeing each other for about 3 weeks behind my back. I told him that I really do hope it works out for him and her, and that I enjoyed our time together and asked him to leave. He said he really cares for me and asked if we could still be friends and I responded with "Of course!" smiles and all and then shut the door. I called off work and cried for about 4/5 hours.

    This was 5 days ago, and he has texted me twice asking to hang out. I keep saying I have to work (which is true, but I lie about the time so I don't have to see him), but he keeps trying to reschedule. Theo keeps calling me and I keep telling her the same and that I don't have time to talk. In all honesty, I just want to do nothing but cry and die. I don't even know what to do, because I'm hitting my breaking point and am most likely going to explode on them and ruin my friendships with them too. But I can't just say bye to them either. I just don't know what to do.

    The End

  2. The four songs that Gaga should have kept as their live performances from ARTPOP:





    Fashion: William's part is trash and ruins the song; ARTPOP: Production and singing were better live; Sexxx Dreams @ the iTunes Fest. was so much more mysterious and fitting to the song; Aura: I mean, come on, the demo just sounds better.

    K bye. 

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    Hey y'all

    could you help me by voting for this? it's a submission page for UKF and i want to get them to see the song :pray:

    thanks if you do <3

  3. More Than a Day has made it to No.2 on the Official Singrush Pop Charts!!! (If you Voted Thank you so much!!!)

    This song to me has practically been my most appreciated, 'successful' song!!! It had made it onto Radios, adverts/commercials! My song was used as an official LVB Soundtrack!!! Without your support guys, I couldn't have done it! You can download this song for free here, if you want it, its a thank you from me, personally, Love youuuu <3

  4. I see you here

    I see you there

    I can't hear you

    But I can speak to you

    You are in my house

    You are in the train

    You are wherever I am

    You are at my computerarrow-10x10.png

    You are at my mobile

    You are everywhere

    Who are you?

    I can't hear you but I can speak to you

    You are in my livingroom or at my bedroom

    But at the same timearrow-10x10.png, you are at the other side of the world

    Am I speaking to a friend, or am I speaking to the computerarrow-10x10.png?

    We can have fun together, but at the same time you aren't here

    We can play a game together, but we can't make a trip together

    Is this strange? Yet I can't live without you.

    I'm addicted to you, but I can't smoke you

    I can read your latest news, but I can't hold you like a newspaper

    I can give a comment, but I have to wait for a reaction

    The world is big,

    But at the same time, the world is just small

    I can talk to you like you're next to me. But in reality you're not.

    I can support you, but I can't hug you.

    I can say I will be there for you, and I can be there for you

    I can organise an Awardshow and celebrate a party.

    I can celebrate an anniversary month, but I can't see the garlands and balloons

    I can look back, but I also can think of the future

    I can make a wish for you, but will it come true?

    I can wish you a Happy Birthday, but I can't give you a gift

    But I make a decision and say:

    Happy birthday OperationGaga and congratulations Drew and Gia for reaching another year and in a few weeks startarrow-10x10.png the new year with a new look with the update.

    I love you OGG!


  5. Okay, so my reviews are starting to get a bit lengthy. That's why it's taking me so long with this :sweat:


    12. Visions - Grimes

    That seems to be a lot of mixed feelings on Grimes, a Canadian producer and songwriter who remained relatively unknown until her critically acclaimed third album Visions, released in 2012. The album topped many critics end-of-the-year charts, but remained somewhat inaccessible to most listeners due to the experimental nature of her music - most notably her vocals. Although Claire Boucher (Grimes) wrote every lyric on the album, most of the time you have no idea what she’s saying (good luck finding consistent lyrics on google). Her ghostly vocals are without diction, float and coo around the dream-like, electronic synth beats. It’s a style not many can get into, and a few have called a little pretentious or ‘hipster’. However, the mood and atmosphere the album creates is unlike any other. Grimes (who produced/created the entire thing herself in a darkened room in three weeks) provides both emotional and detached vocals through artsy, interesting synths that can’t quite be compared to any others. The fact that you can’t understand what she’s saying is part of the appeal to me, and creates that other-worldly, soundtrack-like vibe of the album. There is enough diction in songs like Genesis and Oblivion to get the gist of what the song is about, while hard hitters like Nightmusic is completely ungraspable, but still pulls you in with its amazing craft.

    Favorite Tracks: Genesis, Oblivion, Nightmusic, Know the Way (Outro)


    11. The Family Jewels - Marina & the Diamonds

    Another artist who gets mixed reception, Marina Diamandis came through as one of those unknown, tumblr hipster artists that became big mainly through their fanbase on the internet. Regardless, she proved to be an interesting addition to the pop genre which was dominated by generic Rihannas and Katy Perrys. Marina writes all of her music along with producers Liam Howe and Pascal Gabriel for her debut, providing a quirky, indie-pop experience for the listener. What’s more interesting than the production is Marina’s vocals and lyrics. Her voice is powerful but eclectic, and her lyrics stray from the general love songs, instead tackling themes like personal ambition, facing success, criticizing commercialism, isolation, and facing your own personal faults. This is the type of cynicism you’d expect from a millennial artist, and it’s refreshing. A slew of songs, which I often like to pair together in a trilogy, are Are You Satisfied?, Mowgli’s Road, and Oh No!, which all seem to deal with Marina’s ripe, growing career, and her paranoia about her ambitions and whether or not they’ll be successful. Songs like Girls and Hermit the Frog are strange and intriguing with how she chooses to use her vocals along with the peculiar production. I would say that, with this album, she calls back to the brave strangeness of Kate Bush, and further resembles the fellow Brit by coming onto the music scene with such a provoking, and original debut. It seems Marina has become somewhat lost since then, with good, but maybe not so spectacular follow-ups. The Family Jewels is a quirky, ambitious, and somewhat dark piece of pop music. Sometimes you gotta hop over the pond to find it.

    Favorite Tracks: Are You Satisfied?, Mowgli’s Road, Obsessions, Oh No!


    10. Ceremonials - Florence + the Machine

    It was on everyone’s mind how on earth Florence Welch - and her machine - was going to top Lungs, which, released in 2009, proved she was one of the most original and provoking artists of the new century. A critic called her music a combination of Adele, Tori Amos, and Kate Bush - and I’m quite inclined to agree if we throw Loreena McKennitt in the mix. Although it’s debatable whether or not her follow up album Ceremonials lives up to her debut, she certainly delivers. Ceremonials is self-explanatory. It feels ceremonious with bombastic production, instrumentation, and vocals. It lacks the certain raw intimacy of the first album, and instead adds a cinematic filter that lays consistently over the album. If Lungs was an intimate pagan ritual, then Ceremonials is a pagan ritual in a gothic church with forty extra members. In fact, it’s hard not to feel like you’re taking part of some type of ritual when listening to Florence Welch’s earthy yet powerful vocals. It becomes almost like a religious experience. Ceremonials is heavy and almost tiring to listen to, with how much it has to offer. The entire album is produced by Paul Epworth, who was behind some of the bigger, more dramatic songs of Lungs. I think that’s where this album might have gone wrong: it feels a bit too much at times, and it makes the really good tracks stand out all the more. With Lungs, you got little treats of acoustic, roughly-made tracks between the intensity. When you have an album full of songs that are all so massive in scale, it becomes too much and overzealous. Nevertheless, Florence and her team really brings out some amazing and memorable tracks, with lyrics and compositions that are more spectacular than most of her contemporaries. (Bonus points for All This And Heaven Too, which holds the most amazingly written lyrics of how love is indescribable no matter how hard you try to write it down, and how utterly confusing it is.)

    Favorite Tracks: Shake It Out, Never Let Me Go, Seven Devils, All This And Heaven Too, Strangeness & Charm


    9. Endless Fantasy - Anamanaguchi

    I was quite ecstatic when I found about the band Anamanaguchi. I had been listening to a lot of old, video game music from the 80s around the time I discovered their album Endless Fantasy, which is a primarily instrumental piece with original “chiptune” or “8-Bit” compositions. The group uses a combination of band instruments as well as actual video game hardware from the 80s and 90s - mainly the Nintendo Entertainment System and the Game Boy - to create it’s authentic sound. Endless Fantasy is like your old video games on steroids; creating rich and well-crafted pop tunes. Despite being New York based, much of the music alludes to Japanese themes; only because many famous games of the 8-Bit era were from Japan and the current pop music scene calls upon a similar upbeat and quirky tone the band shares. There are fast-pace, hard hitters like John Hughes and Akira (I am uncertain if these are supposed to directly refer to the American director or the famous anime film) while there are more emotional-sounding pieces like Snow Angels and U N Me. There are more subdued tracks, like the many interludes (particularly Gymnopedie No 1) and the title track that break up the high-energy rush of the album. Guest vocals are spread throughout the album, particularly on tracks Japan Air and Prom Night, the latter being more like a traditional pop track with their signature chiptune sound. Their lead single Meow features vocals as well, but in the form of repeated ‘meows’. Endless Fantasy produces an array of magical, fun, and danceable electronic pop songs that definitely sends you back to the nostalgic times where ‘electronic music’ was new and connected with science fiction films and immersive video games like Metroid, Mega Man, and The Legend of Zelda. It’s refreshing to find a band that uses authentic software of the time and focuses on instrumental music. If you like old video game music or electronic pop music, I would check out this album. It’s a bit lengthy, but catchy as hell and easy to jam out to.

    Favorite Tracks: Endless Fantasy, John Hughes, Akira, Snow Angels, In the Basement, U N Me


    8. Lonesome Dreams - Lord Huron

    I feel like Lord Huron - a relatively new band, who became active in 2010 - is one of the few indie rock bands who have truly given us an interesting, original sound. Combining the general instruments found in bands - slew of different guitars, drum set, etc - and more eclectic, percussion instruments like maracas, tambourines, hand drums, chimes, cow bells, and a slew of other things allows for an incredibly immersive experience. Their production along with the smooth, melodic vocals of the main singer offers a worldly atmosphere for the listener that is truly fantastic. It’s sounds like this that we need more of in contemporary indie music. Thick and rich compositions that excel the listening experience without being over-produced or pretentious. Lord Huron sounds earthy. Their first slew of EPs have their same distinct sound with washed-out, demo-like vocals, but is littered and seamlessly mixed with sounds of waves, rain, and other nature sounds. Their debut album Lonesome Dreams follows a similar, crisper theme. The art that goes with this album, which shows wide landscapes that are somewhere between old 18th century photographs and a paintings, fit the music perfectly. The music sounds worldly, created by a group of nomads composed these wandering folk tales. Despite that, I feel like they could be placed quite literally in the American west. And no, not like John Wayne west. I mean the deserts, mountains, and forests of the north west. Yellowstone. Yosemite. Wyoming. Oregon. Colorado. Rural places relatively untouched by humans that are touched by every type of weather and phenomena. Lord Huron is timeless and historic all in one, and alludes to images of the yearning traveller. I hope they keep traveling.

    Favorite Tracks: Ends of the Earth, Time to Run, Lonesome Dreams, I Will Be Back One Day, In the Wind


    7. Red - Taylor Swift

    Releasing albums at a consistent, even, two-year basis, superstar Taylor Swift has already released three albums in this decade. With the critically acclaimed Speak Now in 2010 and the commercial behemoth 1989 in 2014, an album called Red bridged the two in 2012. Red is scattered and lacks a certain consistency. That is, of course, besides the brilliant songwriting by the young artist, who was around 20-22 during the composition of Red. The album is long and diverse, and that seems to be what it is makes it so marvelous. Everyone was a bit thrown off when the country rock star released the folky pop mix We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together - a collaboration with genre classic Max Martin - as the lead single. Seemingly promising to make the full leap to electronic pop music, (which she wouldn’t do for another two years) instead we were treated to an album full of folk and indie rock jams that excelled her music artistry like never before. Red was experimental for Swift; partnering with Martin to create genre-mixing, accessible pop songs (only three out of the sixteen tracks), working with long-time collaborator Nathan Chapman, whose sound has beautifully grown from a general, 20th century country twang to something more progressive-rock-inspired and acoustic; as well as working with new producers and writers Dan Wilson, Dann Huff, and Jeff Bhasker (who is best known for working with Kanye West). Along with her sound, her songwriting has also matured, with intimate narrative details in All Too Well, fast-fire memories in Holy Ground, and poetic lyrics in State of Grace. Unlike her previous albums, which were predominately positive, Red is an album of heartbreak. Taylor was obviously in a state of insecurity and low points, which seems to explain the lack of consistency with the sound on the album. With a wonky line up of the tracks - the flow of the album would have felt less fractured if the songs were in a different order - it’s all forgiven because of the pure quality of the music. Fans will boast the solo-penned Speak Now and the commercially accessible 1989, but it’s hard to top the emotional intensity and musical prowess of Red. It seems Swift works best in uncertainty.

    Favorite Tracks: State of Grace, Red, Treacherous, All To Well, The Last Time, Holy Ground, Sad Beautiful Tragic

    Alright, stay tuned for the last part! 6-1 will come along sooner, hopefully.

    I'm also going to make a playlist with tracks from this list and upload it to 8tracks, I'll share the link in the final post in case anyone is interested.

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    Within three days of each other, two people died at my college. They both overdosed and were found unresponsive by other students. One was an off-campus visitor, the other was a freshman student.

    He was my friend.

    I probably won't be around for a while because of recent events, finals, mental health, etc.

    Please tell your loved ones how much you love them.

  6. Lana-Del-Rey-Born-To-Die-Paradise-Edition-1500x1500-2012.png

    15. Born To Die: The Paradise Edition - Lana Del Rey


    14. LP1 - FKA twigs


    13. Gold - Moko


    12. 4 - Beyoncé


    11. Britney - Britney Spears


    10. Aquarius - Tinashe


    9. Broke With Expensive Taste - Azealia Banks


    8. good kid, m.A.A.d city - Kendrick Lamar


    7. Meteora - Linkin Park


    6. My Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy - Kanye West


    5. Man On The Moon II: The Legend Of Mr. Rager - KiD CuDi


    4. Confessions On A Dance Floor - Madonna


    3. Born This Way - Lady Gaga


    2. In The Zone - Britney Spears


    1. Fantasea - Azealia Banks (yes counting it as an album)

  7. I'm only doing descriptions for the top 7 because I work tonight and don't have time to finish (:

    Before I begin, some honorable mentions that didn't make the cut:

    1. Little Red by Katy B

    2. Lonerism by Tame Impala

    3. Take Care by Drake

    4. Devotion by Jessie Ware

    5. Yeezus by Kanye West



    10. Torches by Foster The People

    Favorite Track:


    9. The A&R EP by Annie

    Favorite Track:


    8. TRST by Trust

    Favorite Track:


    7. Ultraviolence by Lana Del Rey

    I have my complaints about Ultraviolence but it was beautifully done and Lana showed a lot of growth and maturity as a musician. That’s all you can really ask of an artist, imo. Not to knock BTD, but Shades of Cool and Brooklyn Baby alone shit on her other albums. Wonderful summer album.

    Favorite Track:


    6. LP1 by FKA twigs

    It took me a long time to warm up to it, but LP1 is one of the best albums I've ever heard. The unique soundscape of each song is so precise and crisp that you can almost get lost in them. I have so much respect for twigs as an artist and her ability to essentially have an album about sex but to talk about it with intimacy and emotional maturity rather than simply being overtly sexual for the sake of being sexual.

    Yes I paraphrased my LP1 review because I still stand by everything that I said !

    Favorite Track:


    5. Visions by Grimes

    Visions still sounds so fresh to me. As Drew constantly has to remind you heathens, Grimes made this album with fewer resources and less experience than her peers yet still came out on top (creatively). Visions is a showcase of pure talent and ambition (an drugs) and it reminds me why I’m so excited to hear her next album.

    Favorite Track:


    4. Born This Way by Lady Gaga

    I couldn’t not include Born This Way in this list. It came out at a time when I was young and vulnerable and needed a role model and Gaga was that person for me. But even aside from all that, it’s just an excellent pop album. It’s unfocused and flawed, but Gaga showed a lot of growth and versatility as a young artist and she got way too much flak for experimenting.

    Favorite Track:


    3. Bloom by Beach House

    This has been one of my go-to albums for a long time now and I’ve never gotten tired of it. What makes Bloom so captivating is that it can fit a lot of different moods; it’s melancholic and nostalgic at the same time. It’s the kind of album that you can really get deeply into but you can also put it on in the background for light listening. While I do have my favorite tracks, Bloom is one of the very few albums that I listen to all the way through every time.

    Favorite Track:


    2. Broke With Expensive Taste by Azealia Banks

    Yes, #2. Now lemme get a gas mask to protect my lungs from inuborg’s fumes.

    I was underwhelmed with it at first, but Broke With Expensive Taste is lovely. I’ve come to respect and appreciate it for what it is – an album swelling with unrivaled talent, personality and flavor (except for Miss C but we don’t have to talk about that). Azealia continuously went against the grain and persevered to create her own brand of rap even at the expense of commercial success – and after literal years of waiting, she finally delivered. Needless to say it was well worth the wait.

    Favorite Track:


    1. kin by iamamiwhoami

    Kin started out a tad higher on this list but I’ve come to the conclusion that no other recent body of work has had a bigger impact on me. While I love all of their releases, there’s an element of personality to Kin, even without the visual portion of the project, that paints a picture of another world. Every song oozes creativity and life in its own way, but put together they all still sound like a precise and cohesive body of work. Even the weaker songs are easy to listen to because they’re interesting. What more can I say? Kin is without a doubt my favorite album of the decade.

    Favorite Track:

  8. cindo de mayo is kind of just an excuse to eat fattening mexican food and drink tequila, but for that reason it's probably one of my favorite days of the year. and by some miracle, I was not working today so I actually got to cook.

    You'll need:

    for chicken:

    - about 4 cups smoked chicken, shredded not too fine

    - 1 tsp cumin

    - 1 tsp ancho chili powder

    - 1 tsp mexican oregano

    - 1/2 tsp kosher salt

    - 1/2 tsp ground black pepper

    for sauce:

    - about 4 cups tomatillos, husked and washed

    - 1/2 cup diced white onion

    - 1/2 tsp cumin

    - 1 jalepeno, roughly chopped

    - 1 poblano chile, roughly chopped

    - 3 cloves garlic, roughly chopped

    - 1/2 cup cilantro

    - 2 cups chicken stock

    for enchiladas:

    - 8 thick corn tortillas

    - 2 cups shredded monterey jack cheese

    - chopped cilantro for garnish

    - diced avocado for garnish

    Preheat oven to 375 degrees.

    Start by shredding the smoked chicken. My local Whole Foods sells whole smoked chickens, but if you can't find one you can smoke one yourself or just buy a regular rotisserie chicken.

    To the chicken, add seasonings (cumin, chile powder, oregano, salt, pepper) and mix. Cover to keep warm


    For the sauce, chop tomatillos into quarters. Set aside


    Next, dice onion, chop garlic and chiles


    Heat a saucepan on medium high heat. Add generous amount of olive oil.

    When hot, add garlic, cumin, onion, and chiles. Cook until lightly browned


    Add chicken stock and tomatillos. Simmer for 5-10 minutes, until tomatillos are very soft.


    Add the mixture to a blender with the cilantro


    Blend until very smooth


    Taste for seasoning (I added salt) then cover to keep it warm.

    Heat a dry skillet over high heat.

    Warm a corn tortilla, one at a time, on each side, until warmed through (no more than 30 seconds)


    Take the tortilla and carefully coat it in the sauce, making sure each side is well coated


    Place tortilla on a plate. Add 1/4-1/2 cup of the chicken to the middle of the tortilla (depending on how big your corn tortillas are), as well as a tablespoon or two of the shredded cheese.


    Roll tortilla and place in a baking dish.

    Repeat process (warm tortilla, coat in sauce, add filling, roll, place in dish) until you've made 8 or so enchiladas

    Once you've got all the enchiladas in the dish, generously coat them with the sauce, making sure each bit of tortilla is covered in sauce.


    Sprinkle the remaining cheese all over the top, and bake uncovered for 10-15 minutes, until the cheese is nice and melted.

    Garnish enchiladas with chopped cilantro and diced avocado and serve with spanish rice and black beans.


  9. I rarely talk about my private life here because it's came around to bite me in the ass a few times in the past, but I've had a lot going on in the last few months and I guess I feel like writing it all out because I'm bored.

    For the longest time I thought I would be in computer engineering, and that was my goal the second I got into college. I was a technician for four years gaining some experience, so I thought I would be able to do engineering easily, but once I got to college I realized how competitive and negative the environment was so I tried to get out of it as soon as possible. I ended up changing my major to Media and Information Technology so I could still have some experience in technology, but also work in media in some fashion.

    As many people here probably know, I'm obsessed with theater. So I ended up finding a club that works in marketing the local professional Broadway national tours that come to the performing arts center that's in our city. I did a lot of volunteer work with group, made most of my friends in this group, and even went to New York City for the first time with this group. As a result, I was named the group's treasurer for the next school year (meaning I get to plan the Chicago/New York trip and I handle all the money).

    In addition to this, I was asked to interview for a paid internship at the Wharton in their public relations department. I ended up getting the position, and so did one of my best friends. So for the next three years up until I graduate I have a paid job to help support myself with doing research and writing pieces on theater shows that I love. I'm really excited to start working in the fall, because we have a great lineup of shows coming that I'll get to work with (Matilda the Musical, Kristin Chenoweth, ect.)

    On a different note, I'll be studying abroad with one of my best friends for a month across Europe. I'll be seeing parts of England, Ireland, France, and Scotland and visiting a lot of different sites I've wanted to see since I was a child. With the program we're going on, we get to visit Warner Brothers studios in UK and tour the Harry Potter sets, see a taping of the Alan Carr show, and attend lectures at Cambridge and Oxford. Unrelated to the program, my friend and I are going to get to see Gypsy, Les Miserables, and The Elephant Man (with Bradley Cooper) on West End, which I'm incredibly excited about.

    so yeah haha thats my life

    i promise i didnt make this blog to brag or gloat but i haven't been this happy in a long time and i deserve it goddammit

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    It actually really makes you think that things could always be so much worse.

    I was at work, it was just a normal day, really, and I was helping customers at the front counter as always.. when I started to lose focus on my work... I got slower and slower in my movements... I felt really odd and weird began to breath rather unevenly... eventually my customer asked if I was ok.. I said I was terribly sorry but I would have to get a co worker to finish helping her, because I just didn't feel too good...

    My heart was pounding really badly, and my asthma started to kick in really bad... before I knew it, I was hunched on the floor, chest spasming in pain, and crying and gasping for breath.

    My boss called 911, and my coworkers tried to get me to a chair, but my legs gave out, I couldn't walk anymore... all I could do was try to get more air in my lungs. Nothing seemed to work... I really thought, this is it, I'm going to die, and lose everyone in my life.

    Thank God the ambulance came, and the EMT (Emergency Medical Technician) personnel came, and got me breathing again... my chest hurt so badly, I thought I was having a heart attack. They stabilized me, and a lady got me breathing as calmly as possible even when the pain hit.

    It was really embarrassing to be carted off in front of all my coworkers, but at that point I just wanted to not have a heart attack and determine what had happened to me.

    Minutes later (seemed like forever) they got me to the hospital, and hooked me up to an IV and heart monitor and blood pressure and all that. Everyone was super nice and helpful and calmed me down as much as possible.

    It turns out if the ambulance had been any later, I would likely have gone into some form of cardiac arrest. So they got there just in time. We still don't know if it was an allergic reaction to something I ate or breathed, or just a fluke.

    The ER doctor told me I had an anxiety attack, exacerbated by the asthma, so one problem fed off of the other. My blood pressure and pulse were very high, so I was on a heart monitor to watch it.

    I never had an anxiety attack before, but now that I have, I know that I will never act indifferent or be confused by anyone who says they suffer from anxiety, because now I know exactly how that feels.

    I sat there in the ER for some time until they let my Mom come back there. I saw a lot of people who were in far worse shape than I, some drunk, some raving, some having come in from car accidents, some just moaning in pain.

    It really made me think, how lucky I am, it could always be so much worse, and thank God I wasn't dead from a heart attack, whatever had happened to me, I was going to get better and survive. It really helped me put things into perspective.

    Everyone, count your blessings. We don't always see how short life is all around us. I'm really glad I had a wake up call like this, even though it freaked me out at the time, to see this.

    I just got back and turned on my computer for the first time in like 3 days, lots of PMs and notifications, I will get to them...

    Also, if I was short or testy with anyone earlier, I'm sorry. It's just been a really rough 72 hours, and I'm still on meds to calm my heart down. Anyway, I just thought I'd share how I felt, hence, the blog starting.

    just some food for thought. Love you guys

    -- C.

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    Hello this is my first blog post here.

    This is strictly based on my personal taste and what's essential to me as I turn 18 years old this month. ^_^

    Back to Black - Amy Winehouse (2006)


    If You Leave - Daughter (2013)


    Born to Die - Lana Del Rey (2012)


    Sound & Color - Alabama Shakes (2015)


    I Forget Where We Were - Ben Howard (2014)


    Ultraviolence - Lana Del Rey (2014)


    Broke With Expensive Taste - Azealia Banks (2014)


    ARTPOP - Lady Gaga (2013)


    Dream Cave - Cloud Control (2013)


    Lioness: Hidden Treasures - Amy Winehouse (2011)


  10. First, some honorable mentions/shit I forgot: Reality Show by Jazmine Sullivan, Goddess by Banks, Yellow Ranger by Awkwafina, Z by SZA, No Mythologies To Follow by MO and Settle by Disclosure

    5. True EP by Solange


    This is the only EP on this list, and its deserves its spot. The is Solange truly shining. The production calls back to a simpler time in music and it boarders on RnB with some 80’s pop. Most of the songs deal with sadder topics, but the tone of each song standout from one another. Some of the sounds even sound upbeat But beyond the production, the lyrics and Solange’s voice propelled this album up the list. Her melodies and harmonies are super sweet, and she had amazing control over her upper register, especially the ending track, she’s hitting notes that some people overlook. And lyric wise, no matter who wrote them, are some of the honest we’ve head on a Solange album. More people need to this body of work.

    Top Picks: Losing you, Don’t Let Me Down, Lovers In The Parking Lot

    4. LP1 by FKA twigs


    The alt electronic + alt RnB mix really creates something special. I know twigs like to distance herself from the RnB tag, but it is what it is. Where this album shines is in its presentation, its 10 electronic songs with rnb grooves and sensual lyrics. The production really shines in songs like Two Weeks, which is the most beautiful produced song I’ve ever heard, and Pendulum, who’s combination of heart wrenching lyrics and hard hitting production makes one of the most vulnerable moments of 2014. The vocals, for the most part seems like another part of the production, and a vessel for the lyrics but sometimes it can feel really effective, like the harmonies in Pendulum or powerful delivery of Numbers.

    Top Picks: Pendulum, Two Weeks, Numbers

    3. Born This Way by Lady Gaga


    Unlike a lot of people, I don’t love this album for its message of the general sense of “Love yourself, dammit” of the era but its really good music. The instrumentals are grand and bold, and still sound interesting to my ears to this day. And Gaga brings excellent range and (mostly) clever writing to the table. There are so many great moments on this album, the outro to Marry The Night, the drums in Hight To Love, The Sax Solo in Edge Of Glory, this album has amazing bursts of genius, musically. It everything I could ask for regarding synth pop. Its also a dark album without being melodramatic or heavy which its unique in this list. And to restate Gaga’s vocals on this album just blow me away some being, Fashion Of His Love, the outros to The Queen and Marry The Night and the bridge of Hair (ignoring the corny lyrics) The best album ever released by a pop star, ever.

    Top Picks: Marry The Night, Scheisse, Fashion Of His Love

    2. The Idler Wheel Is Wiser Than The Driver Of The Screw... by Fiona Apple


    Seven years after Extraordinary Machine, and Fiona Apple only go better (You could really tell you didn’t want to do EM she kind of phoned some of those songs in). But here its all laid out on the table. The vocals are simple yet effective, you won’t see Fiona hitting any high notes, but she portrays sheer emotion with her vocals. The soundscape of this album is the most unique on this list so far. In my mind, it kind of harkens back to the tittle, a lot of the sounds have a mechanical drive, a cycle to them. For example, take a song like Jonathan whose instrumental make me think of a gear powering an assembly line. Lyric wise, in someone the songs she’s better than she’s ever been like Periphery and Valentine but otherwise she’s still ahead of the curve. Lastly, the ending songs is quite different for Fiona and is a risk, but it pays out. The layered effect is striking and an interesting way to end the album

    Top Picks: Daredevil, Valentine, Periphery

    1. Broke With Expensive Taste by Azealia Banks


    I can’t even front. Everyone knew this was coming, but what can I say, I believe that Broke With Expensive Taste is the best album of this decade, and the decade before it and decade before that. Thinking about the past 34 albums I went through and coming to this one, I cannot help but to smile. Ignoring the plain fact that this album spent the entirety of this decade in the works and “coming soon”, listening to this album is an experience like no other from start to finish. Azealia raps and sings her ass off, using her trademark acid tongue flow and sometimes house, sometimes RnB vocals. Azealia collected the help of amazing producers offering the varied range of house, hip hop, garage, bachata, even surf pop. AB even had her own hand in some of the songs, like building Idle Delilah off of the bare percussion of Pearson Sound’s Wad, or adding that heart breaking Horn section to Lone’s Rapid Racer for Miss Camaraderie. Musically, this album is impeccable and a lot of detail went into it, even down to the flow of the album and the implicit story within the album. I don’t think anyone, even Azealia herself could top this masterpiece.

    Top Picks: Wallace, Soda, Miss Amor

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    I am honestly running out music to listen to, and I am open to check out what y'all can offer me.

    Shit I like:

    ● Synthpop (Studio Killers, Lady Gaga, Scissor Sisters, La Roux, Marina And the Diamonds, Oh Land etc.)

    ● Nu-Disco, French House (Daft Punk, Justice, Oliver, Giorgio Moroder, Madeon, Todd Terje, Yelle, Mr. Flash, Jamiroquai, etc.)

    ● 50's - 70's lounge music (Henry Mancini, Les Baxter, Bob Thompson, Walter Wanderley, Dave Pike, Yma Sumac, etc.)

    ● 90's Breakbeat Hardcore and Rave (The Prodigy, Acen, D Force, etc.)

    ● 90's breakbeat and lounge inspired Pop (Deee-Lite, Fatboy Slim, Ursula 1000, Beastie Boys, Thunderball, Pizzicato V, Fantastic Plastic Machine, etc.)

    ● Oldschool House (Deee-Lite, Crystal Waters, Orbital, etc.)

    ● Alternative and Electronic (Azealia Banks, Purity Ring, Grimes, Caribou, Com Truise, Machinedrum, iamamiwhoami, Lone, Zoot Woman, Royksopp, M.I.A., etc.)

    ● New wave (Kate Bush, The B-52's, Yello, Nina Hagen, Sparks, M, etc.)

    ● Disco and Funk (Boney M., The Commodores, Earth, Wind & Fire, Cristina, etc.)

    Some examples from YouTube:

    What I am really looking for is just anything new, sweet, a bit cheeky, something that has a good melody, a good, pumping beat, and something that isn't filled with generic club synths and no-melody basslines. Just hit me up with something fresh and easy. Something that is a bit fun, maybe a bit nostalgic, also quite jazzy and mainly electronic. However, if you feel like sharing the song you feel will take my breath away nevertheless my lists, or if you just know something so dazzlingly fresh and unheard that still has no definition, then go ahead. :prettyab:

  11. When I lean back and look at the current flow of my life, my mind always wanders back to the movement of the tide on a shore. It's constant ebb and flow, like a clockwork rhythm that it can't escape.

    By nature, the waters are stuck in this patterned meter through no action of their own, forced day in and day out to cozy up to the coast in an unruly dance by a force you alone exert.

    Do you think they curse you with their sighs?

    Would you blame them if they did?

    They have no autonomy in their choices. "We're chained to you!" they cry, "Forced to breathe through your iron lungs!" And as you sit in your own fate made orbit, visible only by another's light, you want to scream back it's not your fault. "I never asked to take care of another! I never asked to lose self, to then shift that burden to another!" But what's done is done, and so you resign yourself to silence. Would they care anyway?

    In those moments I can understand you. I too at times feel like I'm here in circumstances beyond my control, kept in an orbit written for me long before you and I had ever known life. But in those moments, too, comes jealousy, an urge myself to be able to impact the lives of those around me; a jealousy that my gravity may never be enough...

    Sometimes when I look up at you, my mind often turns to another, wondering if he too ever steps out on these calm nights and pays you a visit. For a moment I wonder if we ever gaze up at the same time, becoming travelers on the opposite sides of the same bridge that you create. And for that moment I feel like I may just can shape his path after all.

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    Latest Entry

    So I finally had time to play around with drag again and I tried some new things out. All thoughts, comments, and critiques are welcome xx <3



  12. homepage_large.9ee25a14.jpg

    1. Stonemilker: The album starts off with a punch. After several listens, I still find no flaws in this song. The lyrics combined with her unique voice and the strings never fail to make me tear. I especially love the line "If one feels closed, how does one stay open."Breathtaking and one of the greatest songs I've ever heard!

    Rate: 10/10

    2. Lionsong: And it doesn't stop here. This track starts out with eerie, mysterious vocal harmonies in a cappella. The lyrics truly express her emotions towards the soon to be break up. Although not as perfect as Stonemilker, still a stunning track.

    Rate: 9/10

    3. History of Touches: Good song. I love the lyrics about how this may be their last time together. Simple but elegant and interesting, especially the production.

    Rate: 8/10

    4. Black Lake: This song is an absolute masterpiece. Pure heartbreak expressed in an epic 10 minute interval. The lyrics are remarkable in how she compares herself to a lake and how she's broken physically and emotionally by this. The production, especially towards the midway point of the song, is captivating and the song captures my attention for its entirety which is very impressive considering the length of the track.

    Rate: 10/10

    5. Family: Yet another interesting track. I love how the production changes at around 3 minutes in. It makes it an interesting and the lyrics are so poetic and genuine. Beautiful.

    Rate: 9/10

    6. Notget: The production overall on this album is just incredible which is why I continually mention it and this song is no exception to that statement. It's dark, it's different, it's convincing. The lyrics "love will keep us safe from death" are certainly intriguing and the overall vibe of this song makes me eager to revisit it each time.

    Rate: 8/10

    7. Atom Dance: This song is nice. It doesn't really go anywhere but it's definitely different from the rest of the album and the lyrical content is still interesting, it just doesn't stand out.

    Rate: 7/10

    8. Mouth Mantra: Probably the weakest track on the album. It just sort of lacks a melody. The harmonies are nice and the production is fascinating but not as good as the majority of the album, yet not bad at all.

    Rate: 6/10

    9. Quicksand: Good way to end the album. The production is compelling and the chorus is quite catchy actually and the lyrics bring the album to a solid close.

    Rate: 8/10

    ALBUM RATING: 83/100

    Vulnicura is a groundbreaking album that will go down as one of my favorite albums of all time and certainly Björk's best work since Vespertine. Not your typical breakup album, but a painfully beautiful journey for the listener that will leave you speechless.

  13. Only 5 albums to list this time around as I think this month was a very weak one for music idk I just didn't like a lot of the stuff put out.

    5. Modest Mouse - Strangers To Ourselves


    Fabulous indie rock record. Definitely worth checking out

    4. Death Grips - The Powers That B


    Extremely progressive and experimental hip hop record. Really interesting and a rewarding listen. Really innovative stuff

    3. Kendrick Lamar - To Pimp A Butterfly


    The best traditional hip hop record in a long time. not much else to say. Purely incredible

    2. Courtney Barnett - Sometimes I Sit and Think, and Sometimes I Just Sit


    FANTASTIC female rock album. Courtney's lyrics just hit you like a fucking shovel and have you questioning all of your life decisions, a record that needs a lot of attention and appreciation. Incredible

    1. Sufjan Stevens - Carrie & Lowell


    One of the best singer/songwriter albums I've ever heard. Absolutely beautiful. Sufjan's voice is so gorgeous and his lyrics are extremely heartfelt and tragic. Amazing amazing record

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    Alright I wanna start off by saying this was a very good direct. It had a lot of info and plenty of nice reveals/trailers.

    One thing I'm crazy excited about is the addition of N64 and DS games to the Wii U Virtual Console. More so I'm excited because that means we're closer to having them add GameCube titles to the virtual console and I desperately want to play Paper Mario: Thousand Year Door again.

    But now to trailers!

    First up Xenoblade Chronicles 3D!

    The trailer itself looks gorgeous and I'm glad they finally added actual plot content to the reveal. Really excited about this game and it looks like it's going to have a great story to go along with.

    Next up some new Mario Kart DLC info! Nintendo is finally taking a step further and adding a 200cc subset of courses which is definitely going to add to the difficulty level of some of the courses.

    And speaking of courses...

    We're finally getting the Animal Crossing themed race tracks! AND THEY CHANGE THEIR SEASON AESTHETIC EACH TIME YOU RACE!! THEY LOOK AMAZING!!

    We're also getting new karts and costume designs but UGGGGHHH THE AC TRACKS



    Onto another game series I've never played,

    Fire Emblem:

    To me what's really drawing me in is the story. I like how it's a more open ended plot where you're allowed to make different choices that changes the overall outcome, and it seems like they're actual trying to make you think aobut which choices you want to make so I appreciate that. Also the environments look stunning so that's always a plus. Definitely one of the upcoming titles I'm most excited about.

    Surprisingly we got news on the long awaited Shin Megami x Fire Emblem crossover:

    I'm always up to try new RPG style games and I definitely like the whole modern Japanese vibe they're going for. The characters look engaging and I'm sure the fighting style is going to be something exciting.

    Finally for my favorite moment of the Direct, we got news on a new Animal Crossing spin off!

    Animal Crossing is one of my favorite series and one of my favorites aspects was building my own house and customizing it so this is literally the perfect game for me. It is the title of the bunch that I am THE most excited for. Now if they only could announce Animal Crossing U...

    I'm also really interested in the new Fatal Frame port they announced. I'm always up for horror and I love how it's more of a "detective" style game. Plus @spivey highly recommends it!

    We also got new Splatoon news and honestly it's a game I've been excited for ever since it's announcement so I'm really looking forward to it.

    Plus we also got more reminders of Yoshi, Mario Maker, and new amiibos

    And speaking of amiibo's...


    They're releasing these gorgeous mini Yoshy woolly amiibos for Yoshi's Woolly World???

    I don't even want the game but I want the amiibo because of how fucking adorable it is???

    Anyway that's all the stuff worth mentioning.

    I'd honestly give this direct an A minus.

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    Plastic Raincoats In The Pig Parade - 6/10

    • This song is bubbly and strange, def has a different sound from the rest of the album
    • Love the production, kinda reminds me of passion pit
    • Cute track but nothing special

    White Freckles - 7/10

    • The guitar in the intro slay me
    • Love when the verses start and it gets kinda funky
    • This song is kinda messy in the middle
    • ~ so retro ~ luv it

    Four Shadows - 7/10

    • Another song w excellent production
    • Like White Freckles, the melodies are a bit weak, but the productions holds this song together
    • Kinda sounds like The Cure a bit, def some gothic undertones

    Lipstick - 8/10

    • THE FLUTE just does things to me. Will never get sick of it in this track
    • one of the more poppier uptempo tracks. If people aren't sure about Ariel or want to get into him, I'd start here
    • just love this track! much better melodies

    Not Enough Violence - 8/10

    • this is probably the closest to a straight up rock song so far. I dig it
    • kinda drags a taD.
    • ~ penetration time tonight ~ o_O
    • the bridge is the highlight of this track, serving 90s grunge, and it's the reason I come back to this one

    Put Your Number In My Phone - 10/10

    • This was in my best songs of the decade list 4 a reason - it's pretty much perfect. A modern classic.
    • One of the things I love about Ariel are his songs like this. If you didn't know who did this song, you would instantly think The Beatles or something.
    • The bridge adds a lot of charm and cuteness to it
    • chorus is ADDICTING

    One Summer Night - 7/10

    • really cute lo-fi beachy track
    • v chill
    • kinda serves album filler but his filler is still good

    Nude Beach A Go-Go - 6/10

    • Wish I hadn't heard the Azealia version before I heard this so I could judge fairly but whatever
    • Azealia definitely improved the melody here, I don't like his momentary pauses and such
    • One of the weaker songs so far but it's still v fun

    Goth Bomb - 6/10

    • kinda sounds like it's parodying goth ppl u can totally imagine this song in Hot Topic
    • cute but boring filler a bit

    Dinosaur Carebears - 6/10

    • ok around 2:15 this transforms into like a completely different song with reggae vibes it was kinda a mess before the transformation
    • if the intro wasn't messy this would be 7/10

    Negativ Ed - 6/10

    • now this serves 90s punk. u gotta love all the genres he explores on this album
    • nothing special and i'm getting a bit tired of this filler streak tbh

    Sexual Athletics - 6/10

    • pretty much the same thing i said about the last 4 tracks

    Jello-O - 6/10

    • ​the production on this one is pretty fun at times
    • these filler tracks shouldn't deter anyone from listening to this album - there's still a good handful of amazing songs here.

    Black Ballerina - 9/10

    • god there's so much I love about this track it's hard to transcribe it into words
    • It's funky, it's fun, and it sounds FRESH and retro @ the same time
    • the monologues in the bridge add so much personality to the song. It sounds a bit strange at first but now I find myself singing along to those parts too
    • the chrous is gold, love the added elements in the final chorus too

    Picture Me Gone - 9/10

    • ​one of the greatest power ballads of the decade tbh
    • like PYNIMP, it has that timeless feel, but the lyrics keep it modern
    • Production is ace. Especially love the bridge / outro

    Exile On Frog Street - 6/10

    • smh @ this track ruining the streak
    • the little story in the middle is cute
    • it's a tad repetitive and i wish the song focused on the elements that were in the beginning

    Dazed Inn Daydreams - 10/10

    • I only got into this one recently. Now it's one of my fave songs of his.
    • The chorus is so strong here. I used to dream, dream awake, hide in the dark, fade into gray
    • This song is just so blissful and mesmerizing
    • The bridge too! just WOW! adds a total different element of funkiness to the song. love it!
    • One of the strongest album closers i've ever heard. I really wish this album was like 5 or 6 tracks shorter, cuz it would have had a chance of being of my fave albums .. ever.



    Leaderboard (currently):

    BEYONCÉ - Beyoncé (79%) MC: 85

    Days Are Gone - HAIM (79%) MC: 79

    Born This Way - Lady Gaga (78%) MC: 71

    Vulnicura - Björk (77%) MC: 87

    LP1 - FKA Twigs (77%) MC: 87

    Wounded Rhymes - Lykke Li (77%) MC: 83

    I Never Learn - Lykke Li - (76%) MC: 76

    Too Bright - Perfume Genius (76%) MC: 87

    Kin - iamamiwhoami (76%) MC: 74

    BLUE - iamamiwhoami (76%) MC: NA

    Aphrodite - Kylie Minogue (76%) MC: 67

    Ray Of Light - Madonna (75%) MC: NA

    Visions - Grimes (75%) MC: 80

    Trouble In Paradise - La Roux (75%) MC: 77

    Little Red - Katy B (75%) MC: NA


    Devotion - Jessie Ware (74%) MC: 85

    Susanne Sundfør - Ten Love Songs (74%) MC: NA

    Halfaxa - Grimes (74%) MC: NA

    Vespertine - Björk (73%) MC: 88

    The Fame Monster - Lady Gaga (73%) MC: 78

    pom pom - Ariel Pink (72%) MC: 75

    4 - Beyoncé (72%) MC: 73

    Kala - M.I.A. (72%) MC: 87

    Goddess - Banks (72%) MC: 74

    Tough Love - Jessie Ware (71%) MC: 76

    Homogenic - Björk (70%) MC: NA

    Me. I Am Mariah... The Elusive Chanteuse - Mariah Carey (70%) MC: 74

    Broke With Expensive Taste - Azealia Banks (69%) MC: 76

    The Golden Echo - Kimbra (69%) MC: 70

    Confessions On A Dancefloor - Madonna (69%) MC: 80

    True Romance - Charli XCX (68%) MC: 76

    Body Music - Aluna George (68%) MC: NA

    Red - Taylor Swift (68%) MC: 77

    Bounty - iamamiwhoami (68%) MC: 71

    Aquarius - Tinashe (67%) MC: 79

    Kiesza - Sound Of A Woman (67%) MC: NA

    La Roux - La Roux (67%) MC: 76

    The Fame - Lady Gaga (67%) MC: 71

    ​ARTPOP - Lady Gaga (67%) MC: 61

    Loud - Rihanna (67%) MC: 67

    Kiss Me Once - Kylie Minogue (67%) MC: 66

    Night Time, My Time - Sky Ferreira (66%) MC: 77

    Matangi - M.I.A. (64%) MC: 78

    1989 - Taylor Swift (63%) MC: NA

    Unapologetic - Rihanna (61%) MC: 61

    Glorious - Foxes (61%) MC: 61

    Teenage Dream - Katy Perry (60%) MC: 52


    Born To Die - Lana Del Rey (59%) MC: 61

    Pure Heroine - Lorde (59%) MC: 78

    The New Classic - Iggy Azalea (58%) MC: 60

    Stars Dance - Selena Gomez (58%) MC: 59

    MDNA - Madonna (57%) MC: 64

    Blackout - Britney Spears (56%) MC: 50

    Sheezus - Lily Allen (55%) MC: NA

    Rebel Heart - Madonna (55%) MC: NA

    My Everything - Ariana Grande (53%) MC: 66

    Queen Of The Clouds - Tove Lo (53%) MC: NA

    Electra Heart - Marina & The Diamonds (52%) MC: 57

    Ultraviolence - Lana Del Rey (52%) MC: 74

    Britney Jean - Britney Spears (51%) MC: 50

    Warrior - Kesha (50%) MC: 71

    Prism - Katy Perry (50%) MC: 62


    Bangerz - Miley Cyrus (49%) MC: 61

    Trouble - Natalia Kills (49%) MC: NA

    Need Re-Review (scores may currently be inaccurate):

    Born This Way - Lady Gaga

    Aphrodite - Kylie Minogue

    Night Time, My Time - Sky Ferreira

    Pure Heroine - Lorde

    Ultraviolence - Lana Del Rey

    Warrior - Kesha

    Prism - Katy Perry